My #1 Tool in My Toolbox for This Milso Lifestyle: Self Audits

Self-audits are one of my favorite “tools in my toolbox” for finding joy in this lifestyle. When it comes to many of the major factors of life, such as where we live, how long we live there, what country we live in, and so much more of our lives are dictated by the government. It’s really easy to feel out of control of our own lives because in many ways we essentially are. But I find comfort in the idea that we always have control over ourselves. We can always be “in charge” of our own decisions. Even though our lives are probably not where we always grew up thinking they would be right now, we still have the ability to make the most of where we’re at both physically and emotionally. This is where a self-audit comes in. 

I think we all fall into one of two camps when it comes to the celebration of the New Year. You either love a good New Year’s resolution, or you absolutely hate them. Whichever group you find yourself in I think this fresh perspective might help you as a military spouse more than you might’ve anticipated a new year goal really could. And that fresh perspective I’m talking about is the idea of going through a self audit. 

For me, self-audits are what help me stay true to myself, and stay true to the person I know I can be. Self-audits help connect me to that version of myself that I feel I was created to be. The person equipped to live this life to its fullest. Now don’t get me wrong, that is way easier said than done. It is tough to take personal accountability and make conscious decisions to feel like you’re still in the driver’s seat of your life, even though from the outside it doesn’t seem that you are in the driver’s seat. A key part of a self-audit is getting in touch with the version of you that you think God or whoever you believe in made you to be. I believe God created me for a reason, and I know deep down He created me for this lifestyle, so in those moments when it feels too hard, stepping back and remembering that I was meant to do this helps bring me back down to earth. 

So, what is a self-audit you may be wondering. A self-audit is a way of looking at your life and seeing if its up to par with where you want to be, or think you could be at this moment in time. It can take many forms. For me, it’s looking back at my goals for last year and seeing where the disconnects are. For you it might be goals you’ve had for your future, the kind of parent you want to be, the kind of friend or wife you want to be, the health you desire for yourself, where you want to be in five years, etc. So if you look at it with the eyes of the best version of you, how would being that best version of you change your current perspective or situation in life? 

If things have turned out quite different and you’re not at all where your heart is telling you you could/should be, a self audit can help you realize what the reason for that might be. Is there a lesson amidst it all? What’s the purpose in the struggle? If life feels really great, what helped you get there? How are you going to really make the most of it and savor it? 

I like to break down my self-audits into five “areas of life.” The areas I choose are:

• Finances
• Health and fitness 
• Lifestyle 
• Relationships 
• Career

At the beginning of each year I make a goal or intention of how I want that area to look over the next year. I ask myself which area of life needs to be this year’s priority. Some questions you can ask yourself to find your own answers for each area of life are:

• Where do I want to be in this area in 1 month, 6 months, 1 year? 
• What am I doing really well in this area right now? 
• What needs the most improvement? Where have I regressed? 
• How do I feel in this area of life? Content, happy, overwhelmed, stressed…
• What’s one thing I can start doing today to improve? 
• What are 3 things I can do this month to improve? 
• What is one dream I might have in this area of life? Something that seems almost too good to be true? What’s one thing I can start doing today to get there?

Like I was saying earlier, I think it’s a really powerful thing for military spouses to feel in charge of their own immediate life, in charge of the things they CAN be in control of. Which is namely, ourselves. Though we don’t have control over a lot of our external lives, we do have control over our mindset, the way we react to things, and especially our perspective. 

So if you’re about to start your new year and want to try to improve upon last year, I hope this little self-audit trick helps you! If you’d like to hear more about my own self-audit, you can listen to the episode “The #1 Tool In My ToolBox” on The Peak And Pit podcast!