Combat Deployment from a Female Perspective

Most of us here are military spouses but I feel especially honored to also be an Army sister! By happenstance my husband and sister were at basic combat training together (and graduated a week apart). She, however, got the opportunity to do combat deployment first, just a few short months after she finished AIT (Advanced Individual Training) in the fall of 2018. This week I interviewed her about her experience. Be sure to read to the end for one of the easiest ways to bless a service member who is deployed! 

Audrey is part of the Missouri National Guard. Here is the interview:

Where did you go? 

Kuwait & Iraq – 2018-2019

What was the mission?

We were supporting Operation Iraqi Freedom as well as Spartan Shield

What was your job?

At the time I was a 92F, a Blackhawk helicopter fueler

How long was the deployment? Nine months

What was the hardest part about preparing for the deployment?

Personally, I had just finished AIT in January and left for Fort Hood (now Fort Cavazos) in May. It was all still very new and it felt intimidating to be going so soon after training (and with people I didn’t know very well. Since I was in the National Guard I had only been with my unit a very short amount of times).

What was the hardest part of the deployment? 

Honestly, the hardest part is that you’re away from home and away from people you want to be around. You don’t get to choose the people you deploy with and you’re literally around them 24/7. Being around your coworkers all the time is challenging. It’s who you eat with, sleep with, workout with, and work with.

And it does get hard not being free to do what you want. Not having the personal freedom you experience in your regular life.  

Anything specific to being a female that made it harder? 

Honestly, just the instincts for females to compete with each other. I remember thinking, “there aren’t that many of us, we need to rally together,” but instead sometimes it felt like females would still fight for attention or play the comparison game. I wish it wasn’t like that but that’s how it often felt. 

What can people at home do to encourage those who are deployed?

I signed up for a program through Green Beans Coffee called “A Cup of Joe for a Joe” where people back home can buy you a coffee at the Green Beans on base in Kuwait. I loved going and seeing I had a free coffee or hot chocolate. It usually came with a note from a mom or grandparent explaining how she had a son deployed also. It means a lot when you’re far from home. 

It was always nice when people sent things I needed that I didn’t know I would need – like shower shoes or different clothes because the climate was different. 

Any advice for family members or friends of those who are deployed.

I felt lucky to have six siblings to call and talk to everyday.  I could call someone different and hear about different people’s lives. Being deployed you don’t always have much to say. You wake up and often do the same thing every day. It can seem like the person deployed isn’t  communicating well but sometimes there’s just not much to say. I loved it when people just talked about the little things going on in their lives or in the world that I felt so far away from. I remember you telling me (while at basic training) that Taylor Swift had deleted all her social media pictures. It seemed silly but it was fun to hear about things I wouldn’t know about otherwise. The small stuff is fun to listen to. It’s not that we don’t want to talk or communicate – there’s just only so much you as the deployed person can talk about. Not getting annoyed with that but instead being the one to drive conversation or just share – even when you think its small or silly things, is really helpful!

Was there anything hard about homecoming? Debriefing? Reintegration? 

I don’t remember it being bad – but I had fun doing things I had been really looking forward to doing, like visiting family etc. 

My other single friend and I felt like it was easier being gone than being home and coming back to responsibilities etc. and we were nervous about that. We weren’t dying to go home – to be honest. 

Anything you wish the military did differently? Anything you wish leadership did differently?

It’s small but I felt like communication wasn’t that great. One of those “If you need to know we will tell you,” which I understand for the mission but it was still frustrating not always understanding the why. 

It is helpful and encouraging to know the why or the bigger picture when we can, even as the smallest person on the team. I felt like there could have been more ownership of the mission and that it could have been passed down to help motivate everyone. 

What cool things did you get to experience (military and otherwise):

A group of us visited and swam in the Persian (Arabian) Gulf. We got to go snorkeling off a boat which was really cool.. In Kuwait there are a lot of amenities. It was fun to see guys who wouldn’t normally do things like play Bingo not just go but be excited about it!

Getting to fly in the Black Hawks when we traveled was always cool. 

It was an honor to fly on a C130 from Iraq to Kuwait with a fallen soldier. That was a memory and honor I’ll never forget. 

Audrey & Corrie

CLICK HERE to send a coffee to a deployed service member through Green Beans Coffee! Or visit sendcoj.com . 

After her deployment Audrey continued to serve with her National Guard unit in Missouri while also completing ROTC at UMKC. She was commissioned as an Army officer in May 2022 and has been serving for six years this summer.